where did the time go

Feeling nostalgic. My A just celebrated her 15th bday. Imagine I already have a 15 year old daughter, I am only 35 by the way, turning 36 in a month's time.  Gone were the days when she fancied playing dress up with gowns, tiaras and taking an interest to all disney princesses.

Well she still enjoys getting dressed up, in forever21, mango and zara.  But she is more into jackets and cardigans.  What do you know for her birthday clothes, she got a leather jacket again.  But lucky for me, it fits me as well hihihihi and it is in brown which is my favorite color. This is her 2nd leather jacket, for which it still astounds me when she would really utilize all this jackets and cardigans.

15 years ago, I never thought I could be a parent to A.  When I found out I was pregnant, it scared the shit out of me, being only 20 then and finding out that I am positive with A, my world tumbled.  I did not know what to do, I was even sick at that time and we didn't know who to turn to. We didn't even know of any OB back then.  We just went to Capitol Medical Hospital looked at the directory and we just went to Dra. Belen.  Remember the commercials back then, I think it was Safeguard or something, where they had Dra. Belen as one of the characters.  See how we can still find wit and humor to inject in our very critical decision making even back then.

I had to deal with telling my parents, my brothers and my friends also my hubby's family as well.  There was too much drama back then, not with my parents mind you but with my brother.  He was the one who went amok with the news. As in literally, he stormed out of the house and almost punched a friend. That deserves a different post.  Just so you know, he loves my kids to death and my hubby and my brother are friends now.

My A was part of our wedding ceremony, enjoying the food and music inside my womb. I have not graduated yet at that time, and I had to stop for a year to carry her. My corporate career was put on hold because of her, any regrets? None.  Still scared? Yes.  A was our first guinea pig as parents. I wasn't sure if I can handle it.  My mom went to NY when I was 12 and my teen years I was raised by 3 boys and our Manang who is not married and does not have any kids.
So who wouldn't be scared, right.

I don't have my mother beside me to tell me what to do. I imported my Lola, God bless her soul, as she was the one who taught me the basics, like burping the baby, giving A a bath, feeding her.  I was the one who is personally doing her laundry, bottle cleaning, boiling water. The works, I was a hands on Mom back then.

And did I make a good job? I would like to think so, because I get praises from my sister-in-law and mother-in-law.  I hope that says a lot.  I may have stumbled several times though, she may not be the typical Filipino teeners who says po and opo, but I have instilled in her to be respectful not just with words but how to treat people in general.  You may be saying po and opo but are not respectful when talking to the manang and manongs in school, to our angels in our home who helps us.

We may have our screaming fits from time to time, when she thinks she knows it all, but nevertheless she is a good daughter.  She do well in school, she is caring to her brother and sister when she does not have tons of school works to do. 

She never seizes to make us proud.  She does everything to the best that she can and she does not accept anything mediocre. I love how we can talk about anything, it's like having a daughter and a sister at the same time.  She may not know it, but at her tender age, she has become my wall, to whom I can lean on when I am sad and burdened.  She is very insightful.

Ate A, you are a very talented individual, do not be afraid to spread your wings, do not be afraid to fall, as your dad and mom will always catch you,  maybe you would suffer a scratch sometimes, I can not guarantee that you will not get hurt, but one thing is for sure, I will be there to help you heal.

 Thank your for being our guinea pig Ate A and happy birthday, 3 more years you will be an adult.